More Than Enough

Can this last forever?

I experienced life with LESS PAIN for five days in a ROW!

I often forget what it feels like to feel good. I have chronic pain. Chronic pain means CONSTANTLY… ALWAYS… WITHOUT STOPPING…

Once, Gage told me that what he finds saddest about my circumstance is that I do not pray for no pain; I pray for less pain. I guess that, as a special education teacher, I learned long ago to set obtainable goals. Gage knows me well and he is correct. Given my past, and my current circumstances, I did not see “NO” pain in my future. But, I do pray for greater hope. And, what I whole-heartedly hope for is to wake up tomorrow being in less pain than I am in today.

My friend (and Pain Nurse), Chris, reminded me that my expectations are too low. She said, “Stephanie, God wants to give you more than enough! He wants to bless you exceedingly and abundantly!” In this regard, I truly need to work on my faith. “Enough” is what I have become accustomed, so “more than enough” often seems out of reach for me, my health, my finances and my circumstances.



Chris was right. Gage is right. I need to work on my Faith. One thing that God reminded me was that I need to keep looking to Him to provide. I explained in my last blog that recently, Gage and I were terrified that, come August, we would be out of Disability income and we would also have to take over the costs of my health insurance payments. Disability was approved for 12 months. During that time, my employer, Special School District, was also paying for my vision, dental and, most important, health insurance. In one week, I learned that both were expiring at the end of summer and my world was spinning.

What was I to do?

What were WE to do?



Gage is already doing everything he can to provide for our family. He got a new job with less travel (aka spends less money on gas) and he earns a higher salary. He also is teaching Summer School this year (and probably will for years to come) and is participating in as many extra Professional Development opportunities as possible. He is currently working towards getting his National Board Teaching Certification which, once completed, also qualifies him for an additional raise. What a hero!

As a family where one of the adults is disabled and unable to work, I believe that we are doing our best. Unfortunately, without Disability income and with the looming healthcare bills approaching, Gage and I were at a loss. I did everything I could to ensure that I would get an extension on Disability. I completed all of the paperwork before the due dates. I followed up with emails and faxes to ensure that everything had been received. I contacted all of my physicians and helped them complete the paperwork to send to Disability. I participated in the last of many physical evaluations. All I could do next was wait. And pray.

At first, Gage and I prayed for the $600 a month that we need to pay for health insurance. When I mentioned this to Chris, she said, “Stephanie, don’t just pray for that! God wants to give you more!” I shared this thought with Gage. He agreed. The Word says, “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:20-21). We started praying that God would provide. Instead of waiting the estimated 45 business days to learn whether or not my Disability was approved, I was given the Good News within three days. The Disability Provider approved another 12 months of supplemental income. This income will allow for Gage and I to pay and save for two years worth of health insurance!



Sometimes, it just takes one blessing to be reminded that life can be better, that God does listen, that He does want to provide and that, one day, everything will be okay.

I wish I could write that I am on day six of little-pain. Unfortunately, today the pain is back. However, today I have more hope. Today, I do not pray for less-pain. Today, I pray for a future without pain.